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A week late, but worth the wait in the end.  A double bill of brand shining new episodes of "Malcolm In The Middle" (BBC2 Thu 6.45 & 7.05)  Brilliant as ever!  I'm a sucker for this programme, I admit it. The family & assorted hangers on get more dysfunctional by the minute, they're starting to make the Simpsons look like the model of respectability. Just not sure why they started the series now, when it'll be off for the next two weeks to make way for Wimbledon, but hey. Malcolm!

"Grand Slam" (Ch4, Fri 8pm)  Interesting idea - former contestants/champions from other quiz shows pitting their general knowledge against each other for the title. I don't think being a winner on Every Second Counts, Wipeout or Bob's Full House would really be of any great asset against a Fifteen to One champion, but at least it would be funny! I normally do fairly well from the comfort of my sofa, I can usually get up to £125,000 on Millionaire, but I was feeling soooooooooooo stupid watching this! I'd've been out before the commercial break! The head to head against the clock thing isn't new though. The BBC did a daytime thing with Eamonn Holmes a couple of years ago with exactly the same principle. Timekeepers or something, as far as I remember. Anyway, you get the drift. And Carol Vorderman's still annoying.

"Bad Girls " (ITV, Thu 9pm) Christopher Biggins? Why? This is getting camper than a week at Butlins! Still, could have been Dale Winton.

"Real Life: Noisy Neighbours" (ITV, Mon 10.30)  I was expecting to spend most of the show shouting at the telly, so I was pleasantly surprised. The only people who needed a slap were Paul McKenna & his neighbour. For crying out loud, the underground was there when you bought the house, so shut up you silly little man!  I'm not sure who I felt most sorry for in the rest, the neighbours or the Environmental Health folks. And, what was that locksmith on a couple of years ago? I recognise him.

"Big Brother 4" (Ch4, E4, all the time)  Fed & Jon out, Cam in South Africa & Gaetano over here, it's been a bit of a week! At least they finally won a task though, they're more interesting when they're drunk. Why is the world & his dog making out like it's some new idea to put new folks in the house?  Series one Claire came in after Nick was expelled, series 2 Josh was voted in, series 3 had Tim & Sophie after the walkers walked (or climbed), so a new housemate isn't exactly a stunningly original idea.  Gaetano seems to be more interesting than all the rest of them put together though, so I'm hopeful SOMEthing might happen. Anything, please?  Obvious plea thisweek...VOTE TANIA, for her own sake, I don't think her blusher will last out much longer!

Finally, quiz answer of the week - a Jeep filled with lemons


Lorraine

Picture from Big Brother official site

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Lorraines predictions for 2003

UK TV awards 2002 the Lorr's    Lorraine's lyrical tribute to xmas TV

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