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"Home on Their Own" (ITV, Tues 8.30) Muah-ha-ha-ha-ha!  I can't quite figure out if this is some great big hoax at the expense of the viewing public or not. Guaranteed not to be a second series though, after all, who'd be daft enough to trust the programme makers, and their own little darlings after seeing a council semi turned into Dracula's nightmare with a foot-smell alarm clock & snack-proof fridge?  I can't help but watch, and laugh at the naivety of parents who think their brats will just give them a nice pastel pink living room. Are all kids that evil?

"My Family" (BBC1, Fri 8.30)  Russ Abbot?  Why??

"Have I Got News For You?" (BBC1, Fri 9.30)  Bruce Forsyth?  I thought he'd
retired? Or have they just defrosted him from his cryogenic chamber for the evening?  Same way they keep Dennis Norden fresh too, I'm sure. Bring Back Angus! I can't be doing with any more of these guest presenters, most of 'em are blooming hopeless.

"Just For Laughs" (BBC1, Sat 7.00) I enjoy the chance to play place spotting - in this case Leeds City Centre, and a rather nice-if-pricey bar by the hospital, but not at the expense of watchable TV. Remake of Game For A Laugh? I know what's brought this on, the success of Dom Joly, but this is dire. Beyond dire even, I think I'm going to have to leave the room. The only positive I can come up with is that they didn't decide to resurrect Jeremy Beadle.

"Big Brother" (Channel 4, E4, all the time)  Two Evictions? Wooooooooooooooooh, tense and dramatic moment! Or as near as it gets. Fed has got to go, and I'm praying Jon goes too. I kind of like Cameron, in the way you like an old woolly blanket in the back of your car. Serves no useful purpose, no decorative purpose, but it's just sort of nice to have around.  If Fed manages to fail them this task I think someone will lynch
him. Me possibly. Tania's beginning to annoy me too now, so I'm putting in an advance request for her to be nominated next week. Wonder what they're going to do to bring their numbers back up to the right levels though?  Put Anouska back in?  Put Davina in? Or how about Hannibal Lecter? That'd liven things up a bit!

Quiz answer of the week - Dickie Davis


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