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"The Club" (ITV, Thu
10.30pm) Nice bit of promotion for the latest celeb hang-out
bar. Except that no celebs turned up. (Jordan
doesn't count, she'd turn up to the opening of an
envelope) All it is really is an hour-long advert. I
lost the will to live by about half way through, but I have a nasty
feeling I'm going to end up watching a lot more over the next few weeks.
 "Comic Relief Does Fame
Academy" (BBC1 & BB3 all week)
Or should that say Lame Academy? It's got Ruby Wax &
Ulrika in it. That's two reasons not to watch, though it's
strangely addictive. Only a couple of the alleged student
have anything that could be vaguely called talent, but they won't win
because they never do on these things (though Will Mellor is one of
them, and he's going to get the hormonal female vote) It's
inescapable, it's on all week. Kind of like quicksand, you're
channel surfing and get
accidentally sucked in to see quite how badly Ruby will murder
tonight's song.
"Crufts"
(BBC2, various) I'm sure there's an Ulrika joke in there
somewhere, but I'm going to leave that to your imagination.
Why has Phillippa Forrester become such a part of this? Oh
well, these have got a bit more talent than Lame Academy, though I
think Paul Ross would be slightly less likely to moult all over your
settee and then try to hump your leg.
"Reborn in the USA"
(ITV, Sat, 9.35) I was really looking forward to this, partly
due to my teenage rock-chick crush on Mark Shaw. So I'm kind
of disappointed he's gone before it's started. Strange how
the show said he chose to leave, but the papers say he was kicked
out. I wonder? Why Davina though? As if she
isn't on often enough otherwise. But I guess at least while
she's safely out of the country for 8 weeks, she's not filming anything
else. Got to say, between Doon on Fame Academy, and Gina G on
this, Gina's was by far the best version of Fever, nothing to do with
her
alleged dress.
"Girls Alone"
(Ch4, Tues 9pm) Gah! Do pre-teen girls do anything other than
scream and bully each other? Appears not. Horrible.
Quiz answer of the week - Bungle
Lorraine
Picture from BBC -
Fame Academy - Home Page
Previous
reviews
Lorraines predictions for 2003
UK TV awards 2002 the Lorr's
Lorraine's lyrical tribute
to xmas TV
Issue
47
46 45
43 42
41 40 39
38 34 33
32
31
30 29
28 27 26 25 24 23 22
21
20
New Year Retro Review Christmas Retro Review
Celebrity
Bashings
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