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"The Club" (ITV, Thu 10.30pm)  Nice bit of promotion for the latest celeb hang-out bar. Except that no celebs turned up.  (Jordan doesn't count, she'd turn up to the opening of an envelope) All it is really is an hour-long advert. I lost the will to live by about half way through, but I have a nasty feeling I'm going to end up watching a lot more over the next few weeks.

"Comic Relief Does Fame Academy" (BBC1 & BB3 all week)  Or should that say Lame Academy?  It's got Ruby Wax & Ulrika in it.  That's two reasons not to watch, though it's strangely addictive.  Only a couple of the alleged student have anything that could be vaguely called talent, but they won't win because they never do on these things (though Will Mellor is one of them, and he's going to get the hormonal female vote)  It's inescapable, it's on all week. Kind of like quicksand, you're channel surfing and get
accidentally sucked in to see quite how badly Ruby will murder tonight's song.

"Crufts" (BBC2, various)  I'm sure there's an Ulrika joke in there
somewhere, but I'm going to leave that to your imagination.  Why has Phillippa Forrester become such a part of this? Oh well, these have got a bit more talent than Lame Academy, though I think Paul Ross would be slightly less likely to moult all over your settee and then try to hump your leg.

"Reborn in the USA"  (ITV, Sat, 9.35)  I was really looking forward to this, partly due to my teenage rock-chick crush on Mark Shaw. So I'm kind of disappointed he's gone before it's started.  Strange how the show said he chose to leave, but the papers say he was kicked out. I wonder?  Why Davina though? As if she isn't on often enough otherwise. But I guess at least while she's safely out of the country for 8 weeks, she's not filming anything else.  Got to say, between Doon on Fame Academy, and Gina G on this, Gina's was by far the best version of Fever, nothing to do with her
alleged dress.

"Girls Alone" (Ch4, Tues 9pm)  Gah! Do pre-teen girls do anything other than scream and bully each other? Appears not. Horrible.

Quiz answer of the week - Bungle



Picture from BBC - Fame Academy - Home Page

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