UK TV review by Lorraine Fencer

Oh joy, oh bliss, oh rapture, it's "Children in Need" (BBC1, Fri 7pm onwards). I'm going to conduct a little experiment this year, not quite as scientific as Dave Gorman, but an experiment none the less. Exactly how many minutes can I stand watching this before I need to either vomit or throw the tv out of a top floor window? Immediate switch off for any of the following: Boybands (or their individual members), Anyone who has featured in Popstars, Pop Idol, Fame Academy, or similar, Big Brother contestants (including Celebrity Big Brother), Weather Forecasters singing, World Record Attempts, 2 or more programmes coming together for a "hilarious one off special".

The result? 30 seconds. As soon as the titles had ended, Will Young appears on my screen. OK, let's be honest, Will Young's chin appeared on my screen, the rest of him followed about 10 seconds later.

Gaby Roslin is trying to shout in a Davina McCall type manner, which doesn't work when you're an ineffective blonde bit only there to ease the pain of over 4 hours of Terry Wogan. I'm sure this programme didn't used to be just an extended Top Of The Pops with added begging, but that's the way it seems now. It's like being stuck in Victoria tube station for a whole evening.

10.30.update. I have lived for XX years without seeing Jeremy Bowen in stockings and suspenders. My life would have been much more pleasant if I could have continued it that way.

"The Robbie Williams Show" (BBC1, Sat, 9pm)
Robbbbbbbbbbbbbieeeeeeeeeeeeeee! The World's Most Handsome Man? Well, who am I to argue? You can say what you like about his technical singing ability, but the man knows how to entertain. Just a couple of disappointments with this, I wasn't in the audience, and Robbie kept his clothes on.

"Grease" (ITV, Sun, 5.35) Dear neighbours, I am very, very sorry. I will try not to let it happen again.

"Dead Ringers" (BBC2, Mon 9pm) I like Phil Cornwell (I can't be the only person to remember Remote Control, can I?) I like John Culshaw in a Rory-Bremner-lite manner. Why do I hate this? Do we need another impressionist show? Rory Bremner for the political, Alistair McGowan for the rest. I think this is trying to bridge the gap. The usual suspects - Dubya, Saddam, Nigella, the Royals, the only new one was David Dickinson,
but as the Orange Man has been on every trailer for this over the last few weeks, it's not exactly a surprise. The Newsreaders In Need sketch was the only highlight. As this is supposed to be recorded only a day or so before transmission, I think that was meant to be the "topical gag", but it could have just been an accurate guess. There are better impressionists about, and funnier. Samey and second rate. I need to get out more.

Lorraine

mailto:lorraine@scribeweekly.com

Picture from BBC - Children in Need - Homepage click here to visit and donate.

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